The Mistress' Secret's

Have you ever gotten told some really juicy news?

Things that may make you grab your heart…catch your breath or cringe in your skin??

Well I have just the thing.

Sit back. Or come closer!! Whatever you prefer..

Turn on and tune in…into the unconditional love…

step into another’s life without judgement…without criticism

Remain compassionate to the self you feel in these stories…and leave what doesn’t resonate with you…

Mistress…

1. A woman in a position of authority or control.

2. A woman having an extramarital sexual relationship, especially with a married man

Now we all know there are many definitions that are given to a woman whom has been involved with a married man….or vie versa a man with a married woman….these are not different…but what is different is the way we are viewed, treated and respected afterwards . Men and woman whom have gotten themselves into a love triangle during their lifetimes is said to be a lonely, shameful and guilty part of the souls agreement coming to this earth.

I DO NOT BELIEVE THIS TO BE TRUE!!

What would it look like if we understood the human emotions behind the situation??

What does it feel like??

What does it look like?

Whats the smell and taste of it??

DO YOU REMEMBER ? ___________________________________________________________________________

“ WOW ..What a Home wrecker” “ She's just a hoe”…”slut”

and a ...

“He's A NO good man”…” What a dog.”

These are just some names and definitions that many of these souls have been given... or have heard others call them whom find themselves in this experience. I had listened to a woman talking about how disgusting it was to have found out about this relationship that ended up having to do with a 3rd party situation. She literally talked this woman down and degraded her all over social media….now this happens all the time….

This is down right…Bullying.

This is a generalized way of looking at these type of situations from the perceptions of others, whom never laid a toe in their shoes. This was one of the biggest reasons I have kept this “secret” hidden under self doubt, guilt and shame for now almost 3 years.

But there's an even bigger understanding of why i cant hold it in any longer.

I HAVE BEEN IN THIS SITUATION!!

I was forced to be quiet under the circumstances i was in, because not only did I involve myself in this triangle…

He was my boss!!

So not only did I go against my own values and morals of right and wrong, but I got involved at work.

Situations that I know... are a definite NO NO. But there I was.!!

Stuck in awe over this man.

A mirrored image of myself, staring back at me in male form...

The truth is...

I was pursued and i pursued a man. A man not being heard or seen. A man who has real feelings and couldn't express them. A man who's a great father. A man that is smart and talented. But truly a man who was hurting , who's sense of security, love and affection was being with held from him by himself.

I hadn't let myself feel another persons energy since leaving my child's father. I had put myself in this bubble of a no go zone. I went from super secluded and shy... to thinking to myself and realizing.

" Omg....i am intelligent ...i am beautiful...i am worthy of attention and love."

Something that yes this man jolted in me at the time... my confidence started to soar.

THE REST DARLING IS HISTORY!!

This was not a super hot and super heavy fling in a sexual way, that will be explained later....but emotionally and mentally i connected to him so deeply, so profoundly that i still consider him as one of my best friends. Any chance we had to talk we would. Sometimes that meant being up all night talking about universes and being aware of consciousness. Sometimes our childhood traumas and fears of abandonment. But almost all of the time.... we spoke about how incomplete he felt in his marriage. WE practically became each other's on call therapist. Which i didn't mind at the time because it had been so long for me just to entertain anyone. Here was this guy who loved to talk to me, and we have so much in common. I sat many times in my car listening to his stories...thinking "OMG i know how that feels". Relating and resonating with every word, every tear and every cry for help.

For the first time i had created a relationship on pure honesty and authentic expression.

I know what your thinking...HOW IS THIS HONESTY???

TRUTH...

We had to lie... to everyone else... but what we had found was a very safe place within the walls we built around us...to just be ourselves and to be loved anyways.

This is the story they don't tell you. The feelings we don't talk about out of the fear of being judged, and ridiculed by family and friends. Cast out because we didn't abide by the rules of marriage and vows.

So...

My questions are…

Where do we go from here??

What does love mean to us?

What are our core beliefs??

Why are we accepting of one thing and not the other?

Why are these women and men on both sides not receiving the help they need?

Whats missing?

Why are we getting married to people we don’t know?

and for goodness sakes...

Why CAN'T we communicate?

Communication is key and that’s the truth…Honesty and freedom to be ME is what is key… and this is why I want to share my story…respectfully!

I know there are women and men all over the world whom have been a part of something like this…whether it be the 3 in the triangle or the outsiders like family and friends.

I am not your normal human being. As an empath I have a way of feeling things and seeing things that I can’t explain. I also have realized through this situation like many others you will read that I have grown extremely more conscious about how I view myself and things around me by the experiences i've gone through.

Hold onto you panties Karen because here we GO!!

3 Years ago..When I met my triangle…

I was in a very vulnerable state of mind. I was leaving this 8 year toxic and abusive relationship with my children's father and I was ready to spread my wings...

I found myself really believing what this man had told me for years and years...

"Your a fat...ugly...slut...You'll never have anyone love you...".

"Your just a washed up mom with 3 kids...No ones going to love you."

Among many more...but you get the point.

If you have ever been in an abusive relationship...whether it be mental, emotional, or physical you know how it feels and resonate with that. Which is another story to be told.

I had just lost another job working housekeeping at a hotel. That job in which he hated so much bc he saw me really starting to open up with people. He started to be with the kids more without me, we had switched roles. He became a stay at home dad and i became the one going out to work. Which he didn't like either...he was losing control.

I met some girls there that became very good friends and started to step out of my comfort zone. Started to slowly release tension i had built up from being confined to a box for so long. I started to see ME come back to life...

At this point ladies and gentlemen....i had begun blossoming. I was going out with my kids more, seeing my girlfriends and their kids.

Having that adult girl time...is what truly helped me. They gave me the support i so needed in this time of growing and grieving. They were there to talk to..to cry with...and to drink to it!!

I FELT PURE FREEDOM...

After losing that job i knew i needed to get back into the work scene. Life as we know it will bring you to your knees when you need money to take care of your family. So i applied to places and got a call back three days later...I had an interview.

I had arrived....

A cute little health food store in this beautiful town in the mountains where i used to live was the perfect fit to my new found spirituality and health quest journey.

I walked towards the picnic table in this grassy yard sprung with flowers to a woman and man sitting with a notebook.

This is where i first laid eyes on the man that would change my life forever!!

To be honest the first thing i noticed was his ring. NOT because i was looking for a man, after an 8 year toxic relationship, on top of being a single mother, that was the last thing on my mind.

The reason i mention this moment is to say that, this was his "When i saw you i fell in love with you" moment. With me not even knowing how much or how far i was going to go in dealings with him, he somehow knew. For me in the beginning he was off limits bc of his ring...bc i know better. Yes he was attractive but he was also my boss, and YOU DON'T GET INVOLVED WITH YOOUR BOSS!!

(BIG BREATH)

As we started to work together we found out more about each other. I had found out that he was a rapper and loved music. That became the ish that got me interested. As a very creative woman and a music lover i found someone with as much passion about music as me and that was great. I had forgotten how much i loved things i used to do as a kid. Like listening to songs and rapping/singing. How much i loved writing poetry. How creative i am. How smart i am.

We say we are all one, and so if we are in fact just given different souls at different times to show you something about yourself....boy did i get it.

I didn't realize at the time how much this relationship was going to change me. I didn't know how much of a mirrored self i was in store for. I didn't know to the depths of yearning i would endeavor. The type of vulnerability i was to see with all of my senses. Days where i felt lifted and nights where i cried myself to sleep.

It's been a long time coming to share this very big part of my story. This is where i found love for myself again in the midst of falling in love with a married man.....

Leave me a comment below... if you want to hear the rest of the story...

If i get enough commentary on this topic i will do full disclosure ...a break down and break through and respond with a QnA.

How does this make you feel?

Change Image

• I am not afraid to speak on this topic.
• I think this is to raw for me to speak about.
• I have been in this situation!!
• I have not been in this situation, but my ____ has...